Creating Happiness - That Smile on the Face of Your Soul

Happiness. Was there ever a more agreed upon state of being that the entire universe desires?  Everyone wants happiness- that  positive emotion of pleasure combined with the deeper feelings of engagement and meaning (Martin Seligman). Philosophies are centered around it, songs written about it, even founding fathers declaring it's value. And, of course, modern thought consumed by being successful so one can be happy.  And while I admit to being strongly influenced... okay- BUYING INTO this last concept hook, line, and sinker, it has presented frustrations for me on two fronts.

Problem #1- I refer to it as the 'Hamster on the Wheel'. I have been known to set goals, telling myself "when I do/get such and such, that will make me so happy." Yet when said goal is reached, I don't have the feels I expect, so I end up saying, "well, when I do/get to the next level by doing/getting such and such AND so and so, then that will make me happy." You see where this is going, right? The road to happiness wheel just keeps spinning as my hamster efforts exhaust me in the process.

Problem #2- I refer to it as the 'Perfect Plans Gone Awry Syndrome'. My perception of how things need to go in order for me to experience success and be happy is frequently interrupted by people and circumstances out my control. So annoying, right? I find myself thinking, "This wasn't supposed to happen! How could they/it interfere like that? There's no way I'm accepting that. That makes me so unhappy!"

Through a process of forced self-reflection (that's a nice way of saying hitting rock bottom), I concluded I had some twisted thinking regarding happiness. Without realizing it, I had turned over much of my control of thoughts and feelings to circumstances and the effects of other people's actions on my life. I even discovered that the whole "success brings happiness" theory is COMPLETELY FALSE. In fact, the opposite is true. Happiness brings success.

Among the important sources that helped me have this epiphany was The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor.  I wish there was a way to succinctly summarize all of his research and methods, but frankly it is just so extensive and amazing I highly recommend you read it yourself. Suffice it to say it was extremely enlightening to learn that there are great strategies to implement on a daily basis that allow me to take charge of my own state of well-being and redirect my thought processes regarding success for my emotional health, positive feelings, and well, happiness. 

I would like to share with you one huge takeaway I got from my reading and a ridiculously  SIMPLE way to experience happiness in daily life. Take note of these 2 easy steps, my friends:


Step 1: Evaluate yourself. Did you know that when you exercise your character strengths and special skills your positivity surges? Yes, it's been proven by research. You can quickly and easily find and rank your positive traits, thanks to the internet. Go to https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register and take the FREE survey to rank your signature strengths and be honest. I have taken personality and spiritual gifts tests before, but this is different. It was like turning the light on as I realized why I get jazzed about the stuff that gets my energy up and puts a smile on my face. Also, my list of top ten strengths had a few surprises that have increased my awareness of the depth and reality of who I really am. So cool.

Step 2: List your top 5 strengths and make a point to participate in an activity exercising one of those strengths every day. Sometimes the grind of what we feel we HAVE to do in a day ends up encroaching on the necessity of enhancing our embedded unique attributes and passion. But ultimately, I control my thoughts, feelings and decisions. You know who controls your decisions to be happy? YOU DO. So I'm  calling you out!. I challenge you to think about a new way to use one of your strengths every day for a week... and FEEL YOUR POSITIVITY ELEVATE.

This totally works, you guys. Speaking for myself, I have felt my pleasure, engagement, and meaning increase significantly as I creatively utilize my traits. It's been really eye opening to see how practicing spirituality, love of learning, love, creativity, and gratitude  (my top five) are absolutely essential to boosting my joy in the ebb and flow of life. Because I experience these boosts regularly, I find myself being more productive, more motivated, more confident, better at problem solving, and satisfied with my life. Hmmm...that sounds a lot like being successful.

So seriously, you absolutely, positively should try this. We're talking the ultimate in adapting, executing, and enjoyment here. You won't be disappointed. In fact, I'm so confident you will experience an extra spring in your emotional step and have a bigger smile on the face of your soul that I am saying "You're welcome" in advance!  It's never been more applicable for me to use my motto to encourage you than it is in this moment: YOU CREATE THE JOY THAT MAKES YOUR LIFE  BETTER.

*What are your top 5? I hope you'll share your top 5 signature strengths as a comment below. It is so fascinating and awesome to see how our special traits work in tandem to make our world a better place.*