Makeover Magic - Going Farmhouse Chic

Ready, set, go- I'm diving into the farmhouse chic craze, folks! My kitchen has needed a little makeover magic for awhile now and I decided there's no time like the present.

Grabbed some knick knacks off the bookshelves,
painted a chalkboard label on the pitcher, and
I'm in love with my new centerpiece!

This is the before shot of the
centerpiece tray I "borrowed"
from the mancave. It's definitely been upgraded!

Summer is the season I put a little more TLC into my house because it does have a tendency to die a painful death suffer some neglect during the school year. (Can any fellow teachers relate?) Besides working on extra cleaning, purging, and organizing, I am also turning my creative self loose to rejuvenate my kitchen via upcycling. My PCM (Partner in Chaos Management = husband Mike) is a master at this, so I've enlisted his help and advice as I tackle these projects. We've only just started, but I'm pretty pleased with the direction we're headed. Watch out, Pinterest!

I feel like using canning jars as planters
is kind of a given in farmhouse chic, right?
But how cute are these succulents on a
suspended shelf in my kitchen window!

My PCM taught me how to use
the table saw to cut scrap wood
to the perfect shelf size. Girl power!

These succulents were a great buy at Lowe's and you
can't go wrong using clear jars for containers. Upcycling
glass as planters is really going green! 

How adorbs is this guy?!
Although I do not possess a green
 thumb, succulents don't need
much attention to stay
alive, so there's that. 

Haven't posted YouTube tutorials, but I can 'before' and 'after' picture with the best of them, you know! I am a big fan of using photos to document the transformation process. Know what else I'm a fan of? Saving bank! That's another big advantage of upcycling. Plus, incorporating pieces from our own pile of stuff is helping us be able to make our way through the garage once again. (See above comment regarding purging!) Stay tuned to my blog for more on makeover magic projects throughout the summer. :)

These metal letters are fun,
but small for the space. So I
just hot glued them to wood
blocks. Easy peasy!

Step two involved nailing
a picture hanger on the back.

Voila'! Fun sign on the soffit above cabinets!

As it is with every time I get creative, I experience the joy unique to being able to just "make" something. My favorite analogy about creativity is this: what play is to a child, creating is to adults. When kids are totally wrapped up in their play, time means nothing. Same...I get so caught up in creating that I lose track of time! It's called flow. And that kind of flow is very energizing. The burst of fulfillment that happens when I adapt and execute allows me to fully enjoy my surroundings as I engage with family and friends in my home. Remember, YOU CREATE THE JOY that makes your life better!

Have any makeover magic of your own to share? Feel free to comment below!

Embrace the Becoming

You know what they say..."Never say never".

It's that time in the spring when people post pictures galore of their kids graduating, or getting married, or entering the next phase of life.  Mamas are busy posting pics of their adorable offspring cuddled in their arms from Mother's Day past. They generally wax nostalgic about how they want to just stop the hands of time or what they wouldn't give if they could hold their babies in their arms like the good old days. I guess their past experience of living through newborn baby boy and toddlerhood × 4 is vastly different than mine. Because quite honestly, you'll never hear me say, "I wish time would slow down", or "I wish my kids were little again".

Now, I adored my baby boys. Seriously, they were all dead ringers for first place in the Cutest Baby in the Universe contest if there ever was one. And talk about capturing my heart? Only completely. I fondly remember rocking and singing and reading with those sweet little bundles in my lap.  I can post naked baby pictures with the best of them.

But I'm not so far removed from those days that I don't remember being stressed out, exhausted, frustrated, depressed, or all of the above.  I used to feel guilty when I heard other moms bemoaning the fact that their kids were already a year older when planning the next birthday party. I felt awkward that I wasn't all,  "Why do they have to change so fast?" like everyone else seemed prone to ask. I started wondering why I don't feel that way. So I began analyzing and discovered this: I'm not a totally horrible mom for being glad my kids are growing up and neither are you.

I wouldn't be an inspirational blogger worth my salt if I had you thinking the best days as a mom were behind you. I draw the line at wishing to experience the past all over again. The truth is that little kids are needy. And messy. And draining. And can't do much on their own. And needy. (Did I mention that already?)

I mean, do people even think about what they are saying when they make those statements about going back in time?! Do they want to go back to changing poopy pants every day? Um, no thanks. They really would like to clean up pukey sheets and bathe a sick child in the middle of the night for old times sake? I'm going to pass on that one. Do they sincerely miss answering the question, "But why?" twenty thousand times a day when it has already been asked and answered? Kill me now.

Call me crazy, but I sure as heck will never wish those days back into my life. I paid my dues. This is the time for cashing in on the benefits of kids growing up. No packing a survival bag in preparation for any contingency just to go on a shopping trip. No cleaning up a blowout and continuously treating for a diaper rash. Kids eventually do make it to the toilet in time to flush their own pukey. They accept the answer they are given without the endless questioning... wait a minute. I guess we are still working on that one, but you get the picture!

And that's not even the best part of kids growing up. I can't possibly entertain the notion of turning back time when I see the wonderful people they are becoming. Babies don't go out of their way to fix their mom a carb-laden breakfast in bed on Mother's Day. Toddlers don't wash their own ball uniforms or build their own computer. Infants don't offer to shop for Christmas presents to donate to others less fortunate than they are at the holidays. But my boys now do all those things.

And it's awesome.

Have I always loved my boys? Of course! But as they grow, I find I LIKE them more every day. We share jokes. We discuss deep thoughts. We tease each other. We debate. We rise to the occasion.

You know what's better than having your young kids obey you just because you say so and they feel they don't have a choice? It's having them come to you because you have their respect and they ask you for advice. (It doesn’t happen every day, mind you, but it DOES happen).  It's having them answer your questions to get them to think and learn to problem solve independently. You know what's better than being able to teach them a new skill? When they teach you one instead!

My parenting philosophy is to guide my sons in such a way that each day they need me a little less than the day before. That I "prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child" (Jen Hatmaker). I hope that by my joyful attitude of embracing who they are becoming rather than wishing for the bitty babies of days gone by, my boys feel an unconditional love that will be characteristic of their way of life. That their mindset will always be one that values living in the present moment and looking excitedly toward the future without being mired in the past. I want them to get my message loud and clear- "I am so happy with you as a young man and how you are changing the world for good, that I would never wish you to be anything less than what you are becoming right now."

Moms, how about if we give ourselves permission to celebrate bringing our children one step closer to adulthood this weekend rather than mourn their maturity as if it is a tragedy to be avoided? Embrace the becoming. They will LIKE you even more for the positive message that you believe in them and the best is yet to come. Happy Mother's Day!

Are We There Yet? - Living the Dream Update

I love watching Shark Tank. It's the creative in me, I guess. I'm fascinated by seeing how regular people take their original ideas and passion for their inventions from dream to reality. And then they have those follow-up segments several months later where you get updates on how their new businesses are succeeding in the real world. It helps answer that question I have often wondered, "Are they really going to make it?" It's just kind of cool to see someone who took a chance on their vision find a reward for the risk-taking and hard work. So, in the same vein, I'm blogging my own little update in seeing dreams become reality with the help of my vision board venture.

 

Back in January, I decided it was time to get inspired about making some dreams reality. I call it my 'desire to aspire' process. I created a visual of what I hope to feel/achieve as it relates to my purpose. I can't even describe how excited I am when I seize opportunities that are simple, yet profound, in how they are affecting the life I seek for myself and my family. I purposely left some open spots on my vision board. They worked out great to post 'evidence' of the positive aspects surrounding me on my journey in 2017!  Here are just a few of the ways I'm reaping from investing in my vision: 



One huge blessing of being more vulnerable with people
is experiencing overwhelming support when faced with
challenges. This is generating more joy in my journey.

 

Didn't expect to do a weight loss thing this year, but I realized
the way I was treating my body was not good for my soul, so
I got my courage up and lost 20 pounds...20 more to go!

I am passionate about the Makerspace
Movement and have embraced it in
my classroom.  I realized I didn't have
to be an expert to take a risk and it's
been awesome for my students!

Not gonna lie. This one brings tears to my
eyes.  It's been my dream to launch a
successful educational consulting career
in my passion to uplift and encourage
my fellow educators- and
THIS WAS THE TIME!!!

My ultimate wish in sharing this update was to help empower anyone that is on this journey with me to make dreams a reality and achieve aspirations. YOU CAN DO IT. YOU ARE DOING IT. Take some time and reflect and appreciate what is happening in the present. Now, in the spirit of authenticity, I do notice that most of these vision/goals that are now my reality/achievements have to do with my profession and mindset. I have made peace with deciding that it is okay to reserve energy for some of the family/home hopes to attain to until summer. Hmm...I do believe that is holding myself to a standard of grace, not perfection! Boom. With that said, I'm going to be honest and say that I could be doing WAY better at my goal of "Always striving to give my spouse the very best of myself; not what's leftover after I've given my best to everyone else" (Dave Willis).  Fortunately, I am blessed with a very supportive husband that has lots of grace for me when I fall short.  That actually makes me even more determined to be the spouse that will help him the most. For me, summer is the prime time for creating margins to focus on the action of SIMPLIFYING. I am sure that will involve pruning some of the superfluous branches of my life that aren't yielding the fruit I desire to produce in my family. And although pruning isn't extremely fun and can even be painful, it's that same pruning that will allow me to grow to be a more fully present and engaged wife and mom- which is always a good thing.

One of my favorite mantras these days.

This one has been more challenging
than I would have thought.  I have lots
of work to do, but I am determined.

I keep coming back to the quote that kind of started this whole vision boarding thing in the first place: "Where your attention goes, your energy flows" (Christine Kane). While there are plenty of areas that still need my attention, I can say that my spiritual eyes have a sharper focus as I walk the daily path of desiring a joy-filled journey.  The results of these intentions and the awareness of embracing the progress I have made are sources of peace, happiness, and fulfillment in my purpose.  Creating a vision board has helped me ADAPT my habits to reflect the life I desire, have the courage to EXECUTE new experiences to deepen my calling, and ENJOY a life with richer meaning than I've ever known. I hope that you also have a way to measure your progress and fulfillment. Remember, you create the joy that makes your life better!

What's All the Celebrating About?

Celebrate has to be one of my favorite words of all times. From my point of view it ranks right up there with joy. Every culture celebrates something. In the context of interacting with kids- be it as a parent or as a teacher- celebrating is more than just throwing a birthday party or participating in holiday traditions. It is an essential part of the training process to develop happy and productive adults of the future.

One of the most impactful books to influence my parenting and teaching is "The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness" by Dr. Edward M. Hallowell. More beneficial than any teaching pedagogy class or comprehensive curriculum was grasping the concept of 'successful learning and lifelong joy' explained by Hallowell. He goes into detail to discuss how the five step cycle of connect, play, practice, mastery, and recognition, repeated over and over again, is absolutely essential to a child's capacity to experience a meaningful life rooted in confidence, awareness, and values.
No one can deny that if you love your children (and students) you desire for them to live rewarding and happy lives. These steps are simple, but profound in their importance to that end.  I could go on and on about how much thought and daily effort I put into embedding the first four steps in my students' school experiences, but the purpose of this post is to make a case for the remarkable value of recognizing the early learning milestones that are achieved in preschool by celebrating with a graduation ceremony.

Over the years I have met naysayers that don't understand why five year olds are wearing graduation gowns and tassels and carrying diplomas. My response to this (after expertly hiding my internal teacher reaction of "are you kidding me right now?!") is that preschool graduation is the perfect way to show pride, approval, and support of the learning process. It absolutely creates a positive connection between family and school and demonstrates the value placed on each student's achievement as a learner and their growth as a person. Huge milestones are reached in the three to five years of age window and what a powerful validation to a child's sense of worth and well-being to publicly recognize those!


I wish you could feel the excitement and pride that exudes from these little prekinders and their families on the night of our ceremony. But luckily, the advantage of a blog is getting to see photos of such an event, which is the next best thing! I appreciate the families that gave me permission to share some special moments from our celebration "Oh, the Places You'll Go!" from last year that prove a preschool graduation is truly a worthy endeavor.

A few songs, handshakes from the principal, a diploma, a reception with cookies and photo ops, with some preschool artwork on display doesn't sound that complicated, does it? And yet, an identity as a successful learner is established. It's like making a huge desposit in their mental and emotional bank account. Equally important is the chance a ceremony like this gives the school and parents to prime these kiddos for another walk across a platform thirteen years in the future when they will graduate from high school. And let's not be naive here. Some kids will face very real disillusionment, extreme frustration, and hardcore temptation to give up before that. My hope is that by early instilling in them the belief that they are a success in the realm of education, that they are a valuable member of their school community, and that they are on this earth for a purpose that only they can fulfill, that they can find the will and determination to reach that goal, even when the going gets tough. Because we chose to recognize their mastery in preschool and help them keep the achievement cycle going, they will continue to take risks- to connect, play, practice, master, and recognize their value as a person that makes this world a better place.  And that, my friends, is what the celebrating is all about!

Leave the Judging to Judy

I never cease to be entertained when I watch Judge Judy. This firecracker of a lady just tells it like it is- dropping the truth bombs left and right. She presides over each case LIKE A BOSS... chopping down cases and letting the chips fall where they may because she has no obligation to a relationship with either the plaintiff or defendant. The encounter in the courtroom is a one-and-done event. Her counsel is given while roasting the litigants (which slays me, btw). Justice is served with a side of sarcastic humor. (Please indulge me a few classic Judge Judy quotes in this blog, I beg you!)

Many times I have been tempted to go all "Judge Judy" on someone. Not in a you-broke-the-law-now-you-must-pay sense, but in the I'm-a-teacher-and-have-four-kids-so-I-know-the-best-decisions-you-should-be-making-in-raising-your-child sense. It's just so easy to allow thoughts to fill my mind that the student could be doing so much better if their parents would just... [fill in the blank].  This attitude of mentally judging parents became such a bad habit for me in the past that it began affecting my fulfillment in teaching. I inadvertently started basing my students' ability to succeed in the classroom with what I perceived was the quality of their home environments and family relationships. I took on the role of a victim when my students weren't achieving the standards because I blamed parents when they were not helping their kids according to my expectations. This mindset that I was helpless to influence the achievement of my students because I don't control the circumstances of their home life was leading to serious burn-out. I couldn't let go because I was holding on too tightly to my poor-me-I-will-never-reach-this-kid-because-his-parents-don't care feelings. I remember being devastated after a particularly tough round of parent teacher conferences a few years ago. The needs seemed overwhelming.  The odds seemed stacked against the kids. Failure appeared inevitable.

So what's the answer to the devastating hopelessness of this mindset? It's more than just accepting that I do not have control over the decisions families make in child-rearing and the home life of my students. I found incredible peace when I mentally freed people from having to conform to my reality. Obviously not everyone has the same life situations- ergo, our values are vastly different. When I grasped the futility of expecting parents to follow the same thought processes as I would in engaging in their children's educational experiences, I was able to appreciate the principle of "separate realities" (Angela Watson- Unshakeable).  What informs a family's decisions is based on their reality. Their reality is not my reality. And I have an obligation to interact in a way that builds a trusting relationship all year. It is NOT my place to judge the priorities of families. It IS my responsibility to support their child in the learning environment. It is NOT my place to say how differently I would behave as a parent "if that was my child".  It IS my responsibility to show that student unconditional love and acceptance while holding them accountable for living up to their abilities and potential in the classroom.  It is NOT my place to assume that I know exactly what life virtues a child is not getting the proper instruction in at home. It IS my responsibility to teach students the standards expected at their grade and act as their guide in their discovery of the joy of lifelong learning.  It is NOT my place to worry about the absence of what I consider "normal" routines or the presence of seemingly chaotic functions in their home. (What is normal anyway?  Who decides what chaos looks like?) It IS my responsibility to communicate the ways that I can work with families and offer opportunities that educate and inspire parents to be their child's biggest fan in celebrating success. I offer, but the choice is theirs. I have a circle of influence, but not the power to persuade everyone to adopt my way of thinking.

I wish I could say that I have perfected always remembering these principles, and I am always happy-go-lucky, and I never worry about my students and never second-guess a parenting decision.  What I can say is that those worrisome thoughts no longer overwhelm me. There are still times I have to remind myself of these truths: this child is a gift TO THEIR FAMILY, parents are the experts on THEIR OWN CHILDREN, and their reality is SEPARATE from my reality.  I'm working on disciplining myself to reject thoughts that I know what's best in the entirety of students' lives based on only the portion of what I see in the classroom. I actively seek to recognize what I do control and maximize my opportunities in that area for all they are worth. I constantly look to leverage every resource at my disposal in my goal to reach students and make connecting with their family easier. And let me put in a big plug for GRATITUDE here. There is something miraculous that happens when I focus on being thankful for the chances I have every day to nurture and instruct during school hours. I mean, that's what I hope for my own kids!  Namely, a teacher that cares deeply for my child, that relentlessly pursues the best way she can teach them, and cooperates with me as a mom to help them be the best they can be. Not taking over my authority as a parent, but rather acting as another member of the team to help them succeed.  Connecting with my vision as a fully committed teacher and not a Judge Judy of parenting styles has helped me so much in adapting, executing, and enjoying my instructional and relational experiences with the kids in my class every day because...

Fanning the Flame

I had one of those days.  The kind where you just wonder if you are making any progress at all.  When kids have crazy behavior and lack focus during instruction, it really drains me as a teacher. 

I have learned to draw upon the wisdom of professional colleagues near and far on these kind of days.  I independently practice reframing my thoughts to stay positive most days, but sometimes it's difficult to power through on my own. That's when I know it's time to fan the flame of inspiration and find the strength to keep on keeping on by tapping into the incredible resources of educators I deeply respect. One of those educators is Dave Burgess.

When I first read Dave's book "Teach Like a PIRATE", I received an instant rush of inspiration to try new things, affirmation that creativity is a lot of work and SO worth it, and encouragement that my vision of developing lifelong learners continues to be more important than ANY standard and to keep that in the forefront of my mind every day. It encouraged me to embrace my desire to be remarkable and leverage all the resources at my disposal because my students deserve THE BEST.

So tonight, when I feel like "I just can't even", I know it's time to roll through some of my favorite quotes from this great book and fill my teaching tank up so I have the gas to energize myself to BRING IT to my students tomorrow. Because it's not okay with me to muddle through until I get to the weekend. What kind of life is that?!  I consider myself to have one of the most important jobs in the world.  I'm geared to THRIVE, not just survive. Reading these powerful quotes are like a breath of fresh air when my teaching spirit gets a little stale.

 No wishing for the weekend before it's time. My kids need me to show up tomorrow and keep making a difference. No mailing it in. I'm there to provide a uncommon learning experience because I expect uncommon effort and attitude from my students. I already feel like I'm getting my second wind by putting my focus on creating a unique twist to grab their attention for the science lesson tomorrow.  I have faith in myself and my passion for teaching to believe that my little flickering flame will be a roaring blaze in the morning- ready to start a fire of inspiration because my students deserve it.

Parents Say the Darndest Things!

I know the expression is really 'kids say the darndest things', but when I stop and listen to myself reason with my own offspring sometimes I think, "Did I really just say that?"


In the interest of keeping it real and not taking it all tooooo seriously, I'm sharing some of my darndest things. Oh, and let's not forget the overused sounds-like-a-broken-record reminders I issue multiple times a day, every day, because of a little condition called selective hearing, from which my boys all seem to suffer. I'm hoping I'm not the only one on the verge of going crazy all up in here. In my defense, THE KIDS MAKE ME DO IT.

1) "Can I just have my coffee first?" Yes, I really just heard myself ask for permission to partake of my wake-up-cup-of-joe before getting immersed in the never ending feud of whose turn it actually is to play the PS3 right now. Or who is supposed to put away the cereal. Or who had the phone charger last. The real life or death issues of our time to be sure.

2) "I will have the last word, so you can stop talking now." Call it a character flaw if you want, but I cannot have a 'discussion' with my kids and not have the last word. This gets especially tricky when engaging with my son who has the same character flaw that I do. Said discussion can go on for way too long and inevitably ends with a ridiculous threat from me, i.e.- "say one more word and you are grounded for the rest of your life" or weird little noises that come from my mouth to interrupt him each time he tries to get in another syllable when it is OVER.

3) "Put a shirt on/brush your teeth/put on deodorant." Because it's not enough that these things are part of the daily routine for the civilized world or that we've only been over how important they are a million times. For some reason boys seem to think shirts are optional, teeth don't matter, and deodorant is overrated. No one told me one of my jobs as a mom is to have to convince them THESE THINGS MATTER. I pray that by the time they get to college, muscle memory takes over and it just happens. Otherwise, I may have to learn how to hypnotize them so they end up clothed, with clean teeth, and not reeking to high heaven at the end of the day.

4) "Summarize." Now, I'm actually proud of this one and request the highest of fives from my parenting peeps. A true honest-to-goodness lightbulb moment of genius struck when I realized I could take a reading strategy my boys learned at school and use it at home so my ears don't fall off listening to four kids recap ALL OF THE THINGS in a play-by-play fashion that would make sports commentators jealous. Seriously, it's just too many words for me to take. Believe it or not, a twenty minute story can be boiled down to a three sentence 'highlights only' version. In the interest of full disclosure, this only works if your kids have mastered summarization. But in my family, three out of four boys have this achievement under their belt, so essentially, I've gained years of my life back with this strategy. YEARS. You're welcome.

5) "If you guys are going to break each other's arms off, then take it outside."  I'm not going to lie, when I first said this I almost washed my own mouth out with soap. It just sort of erupted in a moment of weakness during a long summer day when I was D.O.N.E. with sibling rivalry and just needed somebody to win, for the love of all that's holy without me kicking them all out of the house 'til kingdom come. But then again, if you think about it, I'm really kind of preparing them for the real world...survival of the fittest...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger...and all that. Someday they'll probably look back on those days that I just about HAD IT with fondness and say, "Remember when Mom was about to flip her gourd and made us go outside to fight it out? She really did us a solid. Good times."

6) "You're my favorite." This is a classic little ditty heard frequently around our house because I am now a crafty veteran of sixteen years and I am not afraid of using a little manipulation positive reinforcement combined with friendly competition to recognize when a kid gets it right. They all LOVE to rub it in their brothers' faces when this golden phrase is bestowed by me upon whoever  happens to be trying to get on my good side at the moment. For instance, whoever gets in the car first in the morning without being told twenty thousand times that it is time to go... is my favorite. Whoever tells me they like my stir fry better than the Chinese restaurant... is my favorite. Whoever lets me have the last piece of their Hershey's chocolate bar when we are making s'mores...is my favorite. Word of caution: your kids have to be old enough to appreciate the good humor and tongue-in-cheek sass of this phrase. You don't want to scar a little toddler for life because you just called their big brother your 'favorite' (shudder- that's some serious adult baggage just waiting to happen). Want to know a cool thing about big kids that know you love them all equally and appreciate what makes each of them special?  You can tease them about trying to earn your favor and it really is a big joke that everyone can laugh about. I LOVE having older kids!

7) "I'm always on your side and I'm your biggest fan." They've heard it since the beginning. Because in the midst of the chaos and love that is our family, I never want them to doubt that every decision their dad and I make, we intend to be for their good. Even when it seems like I'm against them, it's because I'm actually for them. No one will outcheer their mom from the grandstand in the game of life. NO ONE. I'm there to support them in the defeats and there to celebrate their victories. That is one thing they can always count on. And if I get it wrong, I'm not above apologizing. It's no big secret to them that I'm not perfect. They're not perfect. Might as well lead by example and get on the "I'm sorry" bus when it's time. It teaches them how to be gracious at making it right when they mess up.

So, moms and dads- be encouraged. You're gonna say some crazy stuff along the way. You're gonna wish you had surround sound on a loop playing the phrases you say every day because you're getting tired of yelling at the top of your lungs strongly speaking the truth in love (because these kids are going to turn out to be happy, well-adjusted adults, dang it- even if it kills us). Laugh about it when you can. Say you're sorry when you screw it up. And make sure your kids know they're loved more than silver or gold. You'll find a way because there's no one that's more of an expert when it comes to their kids than you are.

*Got some "creative" parenting phrases that have made your list? Let's hear them!