Your Reality Vs. The Highlight Reel

I love it when a plan comes together. (Thank you, John "Hannibal" Smith, for that timeless quote!) I love it when video tutorials come through and I end up achieving what I set out to learn/do. (Changed my oven heating element LIKE A BOSS, thanks to YouTube.) I love perusing Pinterest for my latest inspiration and finding the 'perfect' idea for all of my many interests. I have 122 boards. (Don't ask me how I have that many interests. I would need several lifetimes to incorporate them all.) It might considered overkill, but I can't bring myself to delete any of them.  Three of my boards pertain to hair.  You know...coloring, cutting, and styling because... well... HAIR! I usually make my theme party boards 'secret' ones so that guests will be surprised at the fan-freaking-tastic details that become part of the celebration. (See above 'plan comes together' reference.)

Every so often though, I get reminded that, as much as I love Pinterest, and YouTube videos, and Facebook, and Twitter {insert everything else taking up memory space on your smartphone here}, the apps/social media that I engage in to inform my decisions/plans/views are just short snippets of everyone's highlight reel and not the entire reality of life as it exists.

For example, have you ever looked at other people's family portraits and thought: "How come my family never looks like that when we get our picture taken?"  Answer: "Because they posted the one photo out of 357 takes that qualified as pin worthy".  (Pin worthy is a thing. I looked it up because I was hoping I just made up an awesome new phrase to be my blog's claim to fame, but someone already did, so never mind.) In my efforts to keep reality alive (I'm nothing if not authentic) and prove a point, I give to you "Edinger Boys and Cousins Photo Shoot 2017".

Disclaimer: I like to think that since I've been involved in family portraits with children since the year 2000, I have good advice to give them, i.e. "Pretend that you like each other and smile naturally". But we all know good advice is rarely followed the first time, right? When that little tip is ignored, I move on to bribes. "If everyone can just please smile and stay in position, we'll have ice cream when we're all done. Maybe the best smilemaker will get a lifetime supply of cookie dough!" By the end though I've unfortunately lost all semblance of patience and have resorted to threats. "You guys need to do this right or you're grounded for the rest of your life." If that doesn't work, I pull out the deadly Mom Guilt Trip (which I'm not proud of, but it has helped get us through several difficult photo shoots, so WHATEVER)... "I can't believe after everything I do for you, all of the sick nights I worried over you, all of the poopy diapers and pukey clothes I've changed for you... to say nothing of entering the VALLEY OF DEATH to give birth to you...the least you could do is let me have this ONE moment of cooperation, literally ONE photo where you all look at the camera at the same time. Consider it a dying wish, only without the death bed." (I might employ a bit of drama- it's all good).

The reality is there are lots of bloopers before the highlight reel. Good thing these boys and their cousins are so cute. Even the bloopers can be precious, if we don't take it too seriously.

The white shirt was supposed to contrast with the lollipop, not blend in. Blue chins for days.

In his defense, the instructions were "Hold your lollipop down  so it doesn't cover your face." Toddlers can be so literal sometimes.

Somehow "pose with your lollipop" translated to "pretend you are an alien visiting earth and you've never seen a lollipop before".

Aaaannnd we never did get a good one
with the candy props. This pic never
saw the light of the social media post until now.

For realz, I laugh out loud every time I see this one. The goal was to straddle the log and lean heads out alternating left and right directions so we could see each face. Logan didn't quite have his balance, but Henry is hanging on to him for dear life, because he's not going down like that! Everyone else is watching the action, too distracted to pose.

Never did get a good one of these either...
he gone!

Finally! Pin worthiness! Our standard went from 'let's have epic props/pose' to 'let's just get them together with eyes open and pleasant expressions'. #winning

I share this because as much as I love Pinterest perfection, I love real life more. I love my tribe. I love that we can laugh about a photo shoot gone sideways and still make memories out of it. I mean, the plan came together...eventually. Who says it has to be a perfectly executed Plan A for it to be a success? Not me! I've learned there are lots of other letters in the alphabet and sometimes we use up quite a few before we land on the one that works the best (my favorite picture was probably Plan W!) Creating your own joy in your reality leaves you satisfied in a way that comparing to others' highlight reels never will. You create the joy that makes your life better.

Where Talents and Burdens Collide

You know the feeling when you get when you read something that is everything you are experiencing, but didn't know how to put into words? So that just happened.

I've been reading "You Are Free" by Rebekah Lyons.  I found the third chapter entitled Called to be Free amazing in its impact on me.  The author takes her readers on the journey of how she discovered her calling when doubting her ability and credibility. I just have to share some of her deep thoughts/quotes that have inspired me and reminded me that God's purpose will be accomplished...and He wants me to be right there in the thick of His redemption miracle!

"The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet." -Frederick Buechner

"Callings are not one size fits all...
[It] isn't limited to vocation. It's rooted in God's creativity and how He designed us.
You may be called to what some believe is thankless work, but in God's economy it will be exactly where He wants you.
Calling is where talents and burdens collide.
God was inviting me to use gifts that make me come alive to redeem the things that broke my heart...He called me to participate with Him in the redemption of the world." -Rebekah Lyons

How powerful to have the assurance that I don't have to be perfect to be part of God's great plan! In fact, He works through my weakness, struggles, and brokenness because that is where I surrender and He is glorified.

Have you ever felt that the scope of your vision and strength of your passion is so great that it almost overwhelms you? I have. I sometimes find myself doubting I have the ability to see it through. We are not alone when we experience those emotions.  History is filled with people have been hesitant when they felt God's call, but went on to carry out His plan when the odds were stacked against them because of their faith. They embraced the truth that ultimately it wasn't about them; it's about the One who created them. 

I love this thought to carry with me when I feel intimidated, fear going deeper, or get discouraged when I experience a crash and burn moment-
"God didn't pick the wrong girl for ministry. The devil picked the wrong girl to mess with!"
-Rebekah Lyons

I find strength in remembering that the Lord knew everything about me before I was even born and longed for me to help build His kingdom even then. He chose me. He chose you.  And the peace and fullfilment of that reality can help us choose to be strong and courageous, knowing that He has equipped us and lives in us to empower us for our calling.

Trash to Treasure

I used to think that 'old and broken' = 'no good garbage'. But not anymore. I've had to train my eyes to see it, but now I understand the saying and recognize how "One man's trash is another man's treasure".

As a window, it's seen better days. But as my inspiration to remake into a masterpiece, it is absolutely perfect!

Take a look at this poor thing. When you look at the surface you might see a cloudy window with a frame in disrepair. But what if you look deeper at the true nature of what the piece has to offer? What if instead of just a peek inside a room, this window offers an insightful look into inspiration?

Ah, now we're getting to the "treasure" part.

I wanted something in my farmhouse kitchen makeover to remind me daily of our family's decision to embrace joy as a way of life in all circumstances and not a destination that awaits us when hard times are finally over. So when I saw the vinyl wall art slogan "find joy in the journey", I knew exactly where it needed to be! Cleaning the window, adhering the vinyl, drilling holes and mounting door knobs, locating my long lost EDINGER metal letters that were cast out of the basement when the man cave was born, finding the perfect silk wildflowers- all took a significant amount of time and dedicated effort, but the finished product is just SO MEANINGFUL to me. It's my own little "window to the soul".

I am so glad I went through the effort to reclaim this window! I love how it turned out and how personal it is for our family.

It also ended up being an impactful reminder of the "trash to treasure" work God is doing in my heart. You see, those branches that were woven in with the flowers at the top of the window actually came from the tree that was uprooted from our front yard last week in the storm.

Not that I think nature sacrificed this tree for my little project, but I truly believe nothing is wasted, if we just have eyes to see it.

Out of all of the steps involved in completing this project, it surprised me that cutting, attaching, and weaving the broken branches was the most difficult. I'm not kidding! I was getting so frustrated. And then I had this thought that hit me like a ton of bricks. Those little branches that shouldn't have been that big of a deal, that took me a long time, and didn't fit together the way I originally intended- are a lot like the broken places in my spirit that cause me to lose my patience. It's just like when I wonder why I still struggle with that brokenness or weakness, or why is the healing taking so long, or what good could possibly come from the devastation of my own personal life storm?
There are lots of questions that I don't have the answers to, but I do know this- God is in the business of bringing new life to what I once thought was completely beyond trying to salvage. His greatest pleasure is in working a miracle to renew and remake my spirit in a way that increases my ability to reflect His love and grace and brings glory to Him. His vision is not only to redeem and restore, but to INVOLVE ME in being an ambassador for redemption and restoration to the people around me every day. I'm learning that if my life is to be the Lord's masterpiece mosaic, then brokenness has to occur for the pieces of the mosaic to fit together. It's tempting to try to sweep those broken pieces under the rug or pretend nothing is shattered, but God is not deterred by attempts to hide. His vision for us is too great to ignore! He has chosen you and me, not to be defined by brokenness, mistakes, failure, or weakness, but to be accepted as His righteous, forgiven, holy, and worthy new creatures in Christ. My heart is completely overwhelmed and I'm moved to tears at the amazing truth of this!

One of my very favorite songs in the whole world is "I Am New" by Jason Gray. I listen to it when I feel the shame of past failure trying to haunt me or when I get discouraged that I'm not further along in my goal to "get it right". Wouldn't you know, the lyrics of this song went through my mind when I was struggling with those darn branches! I started singing it while reworking and regluing them for the upteenth time. When I watched it on YouTube to include the link in this blog, I discovered the visual plot shows them fashioning trash into treasure and so I knew it wasn't just a coincidence that it came to my mind to include it in this post. I really just want to copy and paste the words right here! I hope you'll watch it and be reminded that your brokenness is not trash. Nothing is wasted. He is engaged in the ultimate restoration of His treasured child right now- making you new!
<<View video "I Am New" by Jason Gray>>

Lyrics

Now I won't deny
The worst you could say about me
But I'm not defined
By mistakes that I've made
Because God says of me

I am not who I was
I am being remade
I am new
I am chosen and holy
And I'm dearly loved
I am new

Who I thought I was
And who I thought I had to be
I had to give them both up
Cause neither were willing
To ever believe

I am not who I was
I am being remade
I am new
I am chosen and holy
And I'm dearly loved
I am new

Too long I have lived
In the shadows of shame
Believing that there
Was no way I could change
But the one who is making everything new
Doesn't see me the way that I do
He doesn't see me the way that I do

I am not who I was
I am being remade
I am new
I am chosen and holy
And I'm dearly loved
I am new

I am not who I was
I am being remade I am new
Dead to the old man, I'm coming alive
I am new

Forgiven beloved
Hidden in Christ
Made in the image of the Giver of Life
Righteous and holy
Reborn and remade
Accepted and worthy, this is our new name

This is who we are now

Songwriters: Jason Jeffery Gay

I Am New lyrics © Music Services, Inc

Makeover Magic - Going Farmhouse Chic

Ready, set, go- I'm diving into the farmhouse chic craze, folks! My kitchen has needed a little makeover magic for awhile now and I decided there's no time like the present.

Grabbed some knick knacks off the bookshelves,
painted a chalkboard label on the pitcher, and
I'm in love with my new centerpiece!

This is the before shot of the
centerpiece tray I "borrowed"
from the mancave. It's definitely been upgraded!

Summer is the season I put a little more TLC into my house because it does have a tendency to die a painful death suffer some neglect during the school year. (Can any fellow teachers relate?) Besides working on extra cleaning, purging, and organizing, I am also turning my creative self loose to rejuvenate my kitchen via upcycling. My PCM (Partner in Chaos Management = husband Mike) is a master at this, so I've enlisted his help and advice as I tackle these projects. We've only just started, but I'm pretty pleased with the direction we're headed. Watch out, Pinterest!

I feel like using canning jars as planters
is kind of a given in farmhouse chic, right?
But how cute are these succulents on a
suspended shelf in my kitchen window!

My PCM taught me how to use
the table saw to cut scrap wood
to the perfect shelf size. Girl power!

These succulents were a great buy at Lowe's and you
can't go wrong using clear jars for containers. Upcycling
glass as planters is really going green! 

How adorbs is this guy?!
Although I do not possess a green
 thumb, succulents don't need
much attention to stay
alive, so there's that. 

Haven't posted YouTube tutorials, but I can 'before' and 'after' picture with the best of them, you know! I am a big fan of using photos to document the transformation process. Know what else I'm a fan of? Saving bank! That's another big advantage of upcycling. Plus, incorporating pieces from our own pile of stuff is helping us be able to make our way through the garage once again. (See above comment regarding purging!) Stay tuned to my blog for more on makeover magic projects throughout the summer. :)

These metal letters are fun,
but small for the space. So I
just hot glued them to wood
blocks. Easy peasy!

Step two involved nailing
a picture hanger on the back.

Voila'! Fun sign on the soffit above cabinets!

As it is with every time I get creative, I experience the joy unique to being able to just "make" something. My favorite analogy about creativity is this: what play is to a child, creating is to adults. When kids are totally wrapped up in their play, time means nothing. Same...I get so caught up in creating that I lose track of time! It's called flow. And that kind of flow is very energizing. The burst of fulfillment that happens when I adapt and execute allows me to fully enjoy my surroundings as I engage with family and friends in my home. Remember, YOU CREATE THE JOY that makes your life better!

Have any makeover magic of your own to share? Feel free to comment below!

Embrace the Becoming

You know what they say..."Never say never".

It's that time in the spring when people post pictures galore of their kids graduating, or getting married, or entering the next phase of life.  Mamas are busy posting pics of their adorable offspring cuddled in their arms from Mother's Day past. They generally wax nostalgic about how they want to just stop the hands of time or what they wouldn't give if they could hold their babies in their arms like the good old days. I guess their past experience of living through newborn baby boy and toddlerhood × 4 is vastly different than mine. Because quite honestly, you'll never hear me say, "I wish time would slow down", or "I wish my kids were little again".

Now, I adored my baby boys. Seriously, they were all dead ringers for first place in the Cutest Baby in the Universe contest if there ever was one. And talk about capturing my heart? Only completely. I fondly remember rocking and singing and reading with those sweet little bundles in my lap.  I can post naked baby pictures with the best of them.

But I'm not so far removed from those days that I don't remember being stressed out, exhausted, frustrated, depressed, or all of the above.  I used to feel guilty when I heard other moms bemoaning the fact that their kids were already a year older when planning the next birthday party. I felt awkward that I wasn't all,  "Why do they have to change so fast?" like everyone else seemed prone to ask. I started wondering why I don't feel that way. So I began analyzing and discovered this: I'm not a totally horrible mom for being glad my kids are growing up and neither are you.

I wouldn't be an inspirational blogger worth my salt if I had you thinking the best days as a mom were behind you. I draw the line at wishing to experience the past all over again. The truth is that little kids are needy. And messy. And draining. And can't do much on their own. And needy. (Did I mention that already?)

I mean, do people even think about what they are saying when they make those statements about going back in time?! Do they want to go back to changing poopy pants every day? Um, no thanks. They really would like to clean up pukey sheets and bathe a sick child in the middle of the night for old times sake? I'm going to pass on that one. Do they sincerely miss answering the question, "But why?" twenty thousand times a day when it has already been asked and answered? Kill me now.

Call me crazy, but I sure as heck will never wish those days back into my life. I paid my dues. This is the time for cashing in on the benefits of kids growing up. No packing a survival bag in preparation for any contingency just to go on a shopping trip. No cleaning up a blowout and continuously treating for a diaper rash. Kids eventually do make it to the toilet in time to flush their own pukey. They accept the answer they are given without the endless questioning... wait a minute. I guess we are still working on that one, but you get the picture!

And that's not even the best part of kids growing up. I can't possibly entertain the notion of turning back time when I see the wonderful people they are becoming. Babies don't go out of their way to fix their mom a carb-laden breakfast in bed on Mother's Day. Toddlers don't wash their own ball uniforms or build their own computer. Infants don't offer to shop for Christmas presents to donate to others less fortunate than they are at the holidays. But my boys now do all those things.

And it's awesome.

Have I always loved my boys? Of course! But as they grow, I find I LIKE them more every day. We share jokes. We discuss deep thoughts. We tease each other. We debate. We rise to the occasion.

You know what's better than having your young kids obey you just because you say so and they feel they don't have a choice? It's having them come to you because you have their respect and they ask you for advice. (It doesn’t happen every day, mind you, but it DOES happen).  It's having them answer your questions to get them to think and learn to problem solve independently. You know what's better than being able to teach them a new skill? When they teach you one instead!

My parenting philosophy is to guide my sons in such a way that each day they need me a little less than the day before. That I "prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child" (Jen Hatmaker). I hope that by my joyful attitude of embracing who they are becoming rather than wishing for the bitty babies of days gone by, my boys feel an unconditional love that will be characteristic of their way of life. That their mindset will always be one that values living in the present moment and looking excitedly toward the future without being mired in the past. I want them to get my message loud and clear- "I am so happy with you as a young man and how you are changing the world for good, that I would never wish you to be anything less than what you are becoming right now."

Moms, how about if we give ourselves permission to celebrate bringing our children one step closer to adulthood this weekend rather than mourn their maturity as if it is a tragedy to be avoided? Embrace the becoming. They will LIKE you even more for the positive message that you believe in them and the best is yet to come. Happy Mother's Day!

Are We There Yet? - Living the Dream Update

I love watching Shark Tank. It's the creative in me, I guess. I'm fascinated by seeing how regular people take their original ideas and passion for their inventions from dream to reality. And then they have those follow-up segments several months later where you get updates on how their new businesses are succeeding in the real world. It helps answer that question I have often wondered, "Are they really going to make it?" It's just kind of cool to see someone who took a chance on their vision find a reward for the risk-taking and hard work. So, in the same vein, I'm blogging my own little update in seeing dreams become reality with the help of my vision board venture.

 

Back in January, I decided it was time to get inspired about making some dreams reality. I call it my 'desire to aspire' process. I created a visual of what I hope to feel/achieve as it relates to my purpose. I can't even describe how excited I am when I seize opportunities that are simple, yet profound, in how they are affecting the life I seek for myself and my family. I purposely left some open spots on my vision board. They worked out great to post 'evidence' of the positive aspects surrounding me on my journey in 2017!  Here are just a few of the ways I'm reaping from investing in my vision: 



One huge blessing of being more vulnerable with people
is experiencing overwhelming support when faced with
challenges. This is generating more joy in my journey.

 

Didn't expect to do a weight loss thing this year, but I realized
the way I was treating my body was not good for my soul, so
I got my courage up and lost 20 pounds...20 more to go!

I am passionate about the Makerspace
Movement and have embraced it in
my classroom.  I realized I didn't have
to be an expert to take a risk and it's
been awesome for my students!

Not gonna lie. This one brings tears to my
eyes.  It's been my dream to launch a
successful educational consulting career
in my passion to uplift and encourage
my fellow educators- and
THIS WAS THE TIME!!!

My ultimate wish in sharing this update was to help empower anyone that is on this journey with me to make dreams a reality and achieve aspirations. YOU CAN DO IT. YOU ARE DOING IT. Take some time and reflect and appreciate what is happening in the present. Now, in the spirit of authenticity, I do notice that most of these vision/goals that are now my reality/achievements have to do with my profession and mindset. I have made peace with deciding that it is okay to reserve energy for some of the family/home hopes to attain to until summer. Hmm...I do believe that is holding myself to a standard of grace, not perfection! Boom. With that said, I'm going to be honest and say that I could be doing WAY better at my goal of "Always striving to give my spouse the very best of myself; not what's leftover after I've given my best to everyone else" (Dave Willis).  Fortunately, I am blessed with a very supportive husband that has lots of grace for me when I fall short.  That actually makes me even more determined to be the spouse that will help him the most. For me, summer is the prime time for creating margins to focus on the action of SIMPLIFYING. I am sure that will involve pruning some of the superfluous branches of my life that aren't yielding the fruit I desire to produce in my family. And although pruning isn't extremely fun and can even be painful, it's that same pruning that will allow me to grow to be a more fully present and engaged wife and mom- which is always a good thing.

One of my favorite mantras these days.

This one has been more challenging
than I would have thought.  I have lots
of work to do, but I am determined.

I keep coming back to the quote that kind of started this whole vision boarding thing in the first place: "Where your attention goes, your energy flows" (Christine Kane). While there are plenty of areas that still need my attention, I can say that my spiritual eyes have a sharper focus as I walk the daily path of desiring a joy-filled journey.  The results of these intentions and the awareness of embracing the progress I have made are sources of peace, happiness, and fulfillment in my purpose.  Creating a vision board has helped me ADAPT my habits to reflect the life I desire, have the courage to EXECUTE new experiences to deepen my calling, and ENJOY a life with richer meaning than I've ever known. I hope that you also have a way to measure your progress and fulfillment. Remember, you create the joy that makes your life better!

What's All the Celebrating About?

Celebrate has to be one of my favorite words of all times. From my point of view it ranks right up there with joy. Every culture celebrates something. In the context of interacting with kids- be it as a parent or as a teacher- celebrating is more than just throwing a birthday party or participating in holiday traditions. It is an essential part of the training process to develop happy and productive adults of the future.

One of the most impactful books to influence my parenting and teaching is "The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness" by Dr. Edward M. Hallowell. More beneficial than any teaching pedagogy class or comprehensive curriculum was grasping the concept of 'successful learning and lifelong joy' explained by Hallowell. He goes into detail to discuss how the five step cycle of connect, play, practice, mastery, and recognition, repeated over and over again, is absolutely essential to a child's capacity to experience a meaningful life rooted in confidence, awareness, and values.
No one can deny that if you love your children (and students) you desire for them to live rewarding and happy lives. These steps are simple, but profound in their importance to that end.  I could go on and on about how much thought and daily effort I put into embedding the first four steps in my students' school experiences, but the purpose of this post is to make a case for the remarkable value of recognizing the early learning milestones that are achieved in preschool by celebrating with a graduation ceremony.

Over the years I have met naysayers that don't understand why five year olds are wearing graduation gowns and tassels and carrying diplomas. My response to this (after expertly hiding my internal teacher reaction of "are you kidding me right now?!") is that preschool graduation is the perfect way to show pride, approval, and support of the learning process. It absolutely creates a positive connection between family and school and demonstrates the value placed on each student's achievement as a learner and their growth as a person. Huge milestones are reached in the three to five years of age window and what a powerful validation to a child's sense of worth and well-being to publicly recognize those!


I wish you could feel the excitement and pride that exudes from these little prekinders and their families on the night of our ceremony. But luckily, the advantage of a blog is getting to see photos of such an event, which is the next best thing! I appreciate the families that gave me permission to share some special moments from our celebration "Oh, the Places You'll Go!" from last year that prove a preschool graduation is truly a worthy endeavor.

A few songs, handshakes from the principal, a diploma, a reception with cookies and photo ops, with some preschool artwork on display doesn't sound that complicated, does it? And yet, an identity as a successful learner is established. It's like making a huge desposit in their mental and emotional bank account. Equally important is the chance a ceremony like this gives the school and parents to prime these kiddos for another walk across a platform thirteen years in the future when they will graduate from high school. And let's not be naive here. Some kids will face very real disillusionment, extreme frustration, and hardcore temptation to give up before that. My hope is that by early instilling in them the belief that they are a success in the realm of education, that they are a valuable member of their school community, and that they are on this earth for a purpose that only they can fulfill, that they can find the will and determination to reach that goal, even when the going gets tough. Because we chose to recognize their mastery in preschool and help them keep the achievement cycle going, they will continue to take risks- to connect, play, practice, master, and recognize their value as a person that makes this world a better place.  And that, my friends, is what the celebrating is all about!